The Journey Continues...

Transformation is a process, and as life happens there are tons of ups and downs. It's a journey of discovery - there are moments on mountaintops and moments in deep valleys of despair.- Rick Warren

For the past few months I have been contemplating how to relaunch myself back to the blog-writing world. I have been hitting the backspace button on my keyboard so many times that I think it’s broken. Time and time again I have sat, laid and stood around my house waiting for the right words to flow out of my mind. There were days in which I would just stare attentively for hours to an empty word document in hopes of inspiration. This long absence has made me realize that writing is a difficult task especially when one doesn’t practice it frequently like me who has been away from a classroom. I have also come to the realization that perhaps I’m no longer intrigued by writing; I believe that writing was never my passion but as a way to escape the cruel reality in where I could express my fantasies and my emotions. Writing use to be one of my favorite past times whenever I felt the need to express my thoughts and emotions but now I struggle to get a word out. I have been re-writing this post for months now and I think I finally got it.

I have been on pause for quite some time now; not only in writing but in life. Ever since I left school back in 2013, I’ve been stuck in a profound hole that I cannot get myself out. You might say that I had post-college depression, it’s like when you go to an amazing concert of your favorite artist and the next day you get the feels and you get depressed. Well, that’s how I felt when I graduated from college; I had permitted the depression into my life which caused me to sink into this hole. Rather than investing in my future like many of my peers have done, I had let the negatively and self-doubt consume my soul and now I have not accomplished anything.

I need to reconnect to that young, fierce, proud Latina who I was once, who wanted to embrace her identity and culture to others and motivate the youth in my community. I cannot endure another minute of this state; little by little this hole has drain my motivation to follow my dreams. I know that part of me still remains in me, I need to shake everything off and find it.

 My journey in this world continues…