The Truth Is...

I always have the habit of making stupid decisions when it comes to guys in general, it doesn't matter if I'm dating them or my friends. if you know me well enough, you know that I keep going back to the guys who have hurt me in the past. The truth is that I don't want to cut them out of my life and I'm desperate for their attention that I don't want them to go. Honestly, I know that sounds pathetic and it is. The truth is that I'm afraid, what if I don't meet anyone else? I never been good in talking to guys, more specifically attractive ones, the only one that I could remember is Elias* from that organization from school.

I get it, I don't make the best choices; I always think too quickly before making a rational decision. With Edgar*, he treats me like I'm his girl but at the same time we're not; first of all, we hardly communicate and when he does is when he wants to and second of all when we hang out, he hugs me and kisses me. I don't understand his motives towards me, and I'm getting tired of this. Jay*, my current situation, he tells me that he likes me but not enough to ask me to be his girlfriend. He only wants to see me at night and you know what he wants. Despite all that, I still talk to him and I don't know why? I know that is not right and I have to cut them out of my life. We, girls, cannot let them devalue us, we are worth more than how they see us. I know it's not that simple and it takes a lot to cut someone out of your life.

The truth is... the only two people I truly cared for and might of loved were Elias and Heriberto. But things didn't turn the way I wanted them to be, so I moved on. Hopefully one day, I find someone like them....

Peace.